My Fathers daughter

The cool summers air surrounds me as I sit on the porch biding another day good bye. In the winds I smell the scent of a wood stove near by. How easily our senses are triggered, summer nights growing up. We were not of the air conditioner crowd! Summers were a windows open experience. Some times leading to a cool summers breeze. Other times you sat near the window praying for any breeze to cool the raging summer air. I can’t help but smile, a life time child of the wood stove. The times of cutting wood in the deepest of snow because we ran out before spring. Occasionally waking up chilled because the fire had gone out. The smell was such a part of you it was unnoticed till you were away from it for a while. The scent of a wood stove takes my thoughts and heart back to him. Wood stove and pipe tobacco, two smells that will always bring comfort and a tinge of sadness into my heart. Tonight in the moonlight I can see his smile. It was always a little mischievous, his deep blue eyes that sparkled so. The same eyes that could fire sparks if you misbehaved. Ironic isn’t it; summer evenings he would smoke his last cigarette and tell us all good night. Lock the doors ,shut off the lights and bid another day good bye. As I to put out my last smoke for the day , I turn to lock the doors and shut off the lights. I call to my children a good night and love you. For these few traits of his I mimic or carry I am grateful. I hope that I carry more than this in his likeness. Though little money he helped anyone who asked. He was kind yet strong ,a poor mans generous. As I lay down to sleep I am thankful for the blessing of a summers night. For memories and the tears and joy they bring. For the man I married and my father (passed on now almost 20 years), both strong amazing men. For my children ,one with the bluest of eyes, two with the generosity and fire in their hearts that would rival his. Closing my eyes I can only hope I live a life helping others as he did. Being the strength or comfort for others when needed. In the moonlight of a summers night and every day that the sun shines I am proud. Drifting to sleep, I bid another day good bye, proud to be my fathers daughter !
Land of Rose /



As the rain dances on the roof I am engrossed in natures symphony. Much like the scratchy sound of a 45 on an old record player, it engulfs me in comfort. In this world of ring tones and new alerts I cherish the internal warmth that it brings. With winters departure the sounds of spring create a chorus that sends me to nestle beneath a warm blanket. Hot tea in hand and the warmth of my husband beside me I listen. The birds call to each other amidst the sounds of rain drops riding the winds. I couldn’t tell you what is on T.V. as the moment is just tranquil. I find my eyes floating thru the most recent seed order catalog. Winter whispers a good bye song as spring pushes her out of the limelight. With rain drops and wind winter leaves us, the beauty of spring will soon take the stage. I have scorned the cold and snow of winter. Tucked here in my warm bed with sunny days so close I, for a minute feel the loss of winters beauty. With all the freezing cold there was still a beauty in it all. For all the annoyances, it is a season that brings out the good in people. With a deep breath and a sip of my tea I flip to the next page. I smile to my crazy old self in the realization that winter, like spring will return again in mother natures dance. With every changing season we will regret the losses and cherish the beauty. As in mother natures dance we will have our spot light, then move on for the next season to shine. So I will enjoy winters end and embrace the spring chorus that the birds will soon sing. I know that it is only natural , in our own lives we must embrace the changing seasons. Accept the changes and loss, and grow in the natural beauty that is our season, cherish their passing embrace their arrival !!…………. Land of Rose

Know that in the magnitude of this world we can thrive. There is nothing so horrible that you cannot move forward and or past it. Dwelling on the past will only scar and tarnish your future. I truly believe we make the best choices we can in the moments we have. I know we are also one in the same, yet many characters in the days that span between birth and current day. Know that like the seasons people change. You may have more than one soul mate, makes sense being that we all have more than one personality. Give what you can and embrace the choices made. If and when the purpose for making that choice changes or looses it brilliance then move on. File it as a learning tool, be kind to who and what you leave. Acknowledge what once was, then head held high, shoulders back; embrace and move forward into what is the next step of this journey. Don’t carry the baggage of life and choices. Move them to memories and cherish the joy that was. Learn from the pain that was a part of the experience. For love with out pain has no mathematical bearing in this world. Simplify; love and live and don’t look back..Land of Rose /


We are all simply a small flame that joins with many other flames to create the torch that is life. No other flame has the right to impact or diminish the brilliance that is you. The torch of life flickers with the joy and pain that is living. Shine brightly in all that is you. Let no one extinguish the beauty and imperfections that is you. Shine bright and ignite those that smolder in their own existence. You can be the eternal flame, you can be the ember that fuels the small flames. Know your strength, know your worth. I have seen it within you ; I know !!! Land of Rose /

The smell of burning rubber blows past her face. She turns her head and tucks her nose into the massive space between his shoulder blades. Her own arms are wrapped about his waist, She leans back and adjust her head band. As he starts the bike she begins to quickly braid her long reddish brown hair. The sounds from the race track vibrates in her ears. With head pressed against his back they drive off. She can’t help but smile as his hair catches in the wind and tickles her face. She lifts her head and looks past his strong shoulders into the road ahead. So many journeys they had shared, ages worth, some happy some sad. He was truly a part of her soul. He need only to walk into the room to make her heart skip a beat. She with the head strong, somewhat stubborn attitude that not only conquered his heart but tried his patience. So appropriate that they ride, so comforting is the chaos of the track. The sensory overload of sound and smell. The overtaking way the vibrations of machine meeting road causes your heart to race. Wind blowing in your hair, the road beneath you, all the while wrapped in the strength and love of one another. The bike bounces and he quickly turns his head to make sure she’s ok. She smiles and kisses his cheek. In a flurry of hair that has broken free from her make shift braid ,she smiles and holds on tighter. She not only feels the strength of the man she married, but the gentleness that lives behind those sky blue eyes. Tonight they return to mom and dad, middle aged employees, partners in what we call society. In this moment though, they are elusive, risk takers that ride wild into the wind. Lovers holding tight with only the wind in front of them and reality behind them. The moon has risen and soon it will be time to turn back. But for now she will lose herself in the smell of man ,machine and nature…………… Land of Rose


Memorial day in the Land of Rose

As a child there was the pilgrimage to the cemetery a couple times a year.  The younger years involved planting a plant at the head stones of those whose journey led them from us.  As time progressed it was plastic items and a list of rules that limited what could respectfully adorn the stone.  I have an appreciation for the art that is a head stone. I enjoy reading the stones and picturing the people they now represent.  I have taken my children to see the headstone of my father ,sister and others that have impacted my life. We did the family reunion stroll to look at the many family names that now rest below the well manicured grass and trees.   I do not however go there often.  If you do not know me , my house is filled with animals, plants and people. My decor is early barn, enhanced with the pictures of all the people who have shared me journey.  Memorial day is a time to honor those who have journeyed on before  us. A time when people adorn the stones of loved ones.  Honorable markers for military and those cherished by all who knew them. In my reality every day is Memorial day. If you are like me you walk each day not only with their memories , but with the parts of them that made you whole. Daily, the pictures remind me of those who have gone. No trip to the cemetery is needed as I have their reflections in every room.  Honor and mourn those who have stepped into the next journey before you. Let their memories shine within you, tell their stories and the ways they shared your smiles and tears. More than once a year reflect, let the fire in your heart carry  the embers of their torch.  Today and every day memorialize them in the good deeds done and the stories shared.  No stone can bear witness to the amazing life of  family and friend . You carry their torch, till our journeys cross again. Tell stories of their life and moments shared. In this way their torch and soul carries on till it once again merges within the flame that is you….  Land of Rose

Tired heart

I appreciate modern technology and all the advances it brings to health and safety.  I am saddened  by the loss of  human socializing that has disappeared in it’s wake.  I grew up in a society where you spoke to everyone, eye to eye, person to person.  You couldn’t wait to go to school or join sports or a club so you could hang with friends. You knew most weekends would involve a visit to, or from a cousin, aunt or grandparent. No matter what you thought of your parents opinion you stood silently as they talked.  Today’s world there are teenagers who verbally and openly question the thought that the parent thinks they know everything. Parents , the menace that tortures children and imprisons teens. I fully expect my children to think I’m clueless till they are 30 or 40.  I to in the teen years felt my mom and dad had no clue about the world. They liked to nag,  and chose to make a miserable life of slavery and drudgery my future.  I at 49 ( took till 30 to start to comprehend) realize that parents often make choices and request that seem unfair. As the mother bird shoves her babies from the nest, parents to must push. We need to stand up if criticized, stand strong in the face of accused injustice.  It is hard at times and weighs heavy on my heart. I now know why mom seemed so tired, it wasn’t just the job she had before coming home to us. It was (as i look back now) the job of taking care of us. Many a time when asked to do chores, simple things like dishes of trash there would be complaining . Some times she’d say don’t  talk back and do it, we all have to help out. Others times she would just look down and then do it herself.   Memories now vivid, I can see she wasn’t just tired, there was a sadness. A good mother pushes her child so they can grow and become adults that lead healthy productive lives.  There are however days when moms are truly just tired.  Tired of being wrong, tired of pushing and getting nothing but flack.   Wondering if indeed had you raised them right, would you have to argue for help. Does a mother fail when no one wants to carry the burden of home and food. I’m not sure which is worse the fact you have to beg for help( my moms term). Maybe the fact you just figured they would want to help. Possibly wanting to ease the load of their mother, with one carrying for 3 now adults.  Cell phones in hand and pods or pads whatever they are. Conversations carried out with our thumbs, rudeness to parents. There is an air of entitlement  in today’s world.  So many things have changed since the days of my teens. But one thing remains, the silent hurt on a mothers heart when disrespected.   But as with any mom, tiny comments can hit close.  Even when you know  you will need to stand your ground . If only to help them continue to become the wonderful people they are destined to be. Much like the pain of labor this to will pass. Oh how I rattle on, I should be I must go as I have a load of laundry on the line, and dishes. I look down and say, don’t worry I got it, yes that’s sarcasm.

Empty box

It was a joke in our family that most children would play with the box the toy came in longer than the much anticipated toy. Life is that way, as I grow older I realize we overlook the true meaning of “life is a gift”. It is not a gift that once opened, there is suddenly  joy and fun. It is more like the empty cardboard box that most of us enjoyed as children. Life is only wonderful when you, yourself fill it. Find your curiosity in life, search for love . Enjoy the natural beauty of not only the land  but the people and animals that share it with you. Find the  same excitement you have opening a Christmas present, when you are caught in a sudden spring rain.  Let your eyes sparkle in the reflections of spring lightning as it rips thru the sky.  Know the greatest gift you have received is the ability to learn, grow and share.  You are not only, the gift to others, but  they are yours.  Fill your world with appreciation and the wondrous beauty that can be, will follow.  Land of Rose….

The evening sun sets with in the winds of a springtime storm. The trees dance to the rhythm singing out from the wind tossed chimes that adorn my porch. In the 49 years of my life I experienced many forms of beauty. But in those years I have not only viewed but have felt the beauty of many an evening storm. The magnificent colors of the evening sky, the brilliant hues of yellow and red as the sun fades beyond the blue sky line. The winds dance below, tossing the rain drops into a glittering water full of sun set illumination. As darkness over takes the blue sky and the sun is replaced by the moon the storm passes. It leaves behind the freshest of scents, a mix between new cut grass and the ever cleansing scent of a hardy rain. Tonight the cool air that followed the storm is refreshing. Windows open I lay on my bed, the scuttle of evening life begins outside. Momentarily halted by the storm the creatures retake the night. Windows open the curtains wave casually to me as I breath in the end of another day. With that same breath I embrace the beginning of spring. I cuddle my pillow as the darkness thickens. The moon light dances with the curtains causing little glimpses of light to dance across my bed. There is a peace that comes with age, an appreciation of the beauty and fierceness of mother natures storms. I close my eyes , window open I fall asleep to the sounds of an evening wind. The breeze enters my room and leaves taking all the struggles of the day from me. As will all spring storms it has cleared my soul and revived my spirit. With gratitude for God and nature I sleep. ………. Land of Rose

Windows open

As the spring sun slips slowly below the tree line, it takes with it the warming rays of light that had engulfed me. The sun in all its brilliance has warmed my house despite the best attempts at fall like winds to win the battle of the day. This spring has been a struggle between spring and fall like temps. Confusion seems to be altering the path of many migrating birds. The buds on the trees reach out cautiously ,unsure of the safety in these chilly spring winds. Unusual temps or not you cannot alter the path of nature. Maybe slower to respond they adapt to the differences and follow their natural route. People also follow the animals and plants in winter. We huddle in , most going outside the shelter only to work or collect food. The smell of spring fills the air and our hearts. Much like the animals and plants of nature we slowly step out of our winters lull to cautiously welcome spring. We, like the snakes and reptiles of the woods know deep inside it is time to move. To breath in the soon to be warm spring air. Like the buds on the trees and the birds returning to nest we are creatures of nature. With the setting of the sun my body slows. A new spring moon now claims the sky, shadows form at the edge of my woods. I head inside as I pull my wrap a little tighter. The moon has a spring beauty of its own. I pause and shiver , not just the cool evening air but the reality of natures journey. Seasons and years, each one breathing new life into the next. Time to grow, time to rest and time to heal. All with in the seasons of our life. I shall as with all that is natural enjoy the spring part of this journey. I will grow with in the nurturing warmth of a sunny spring day. I will cherish every moment until the winds of fall call out the approach of winter. I will watch the sun set and the moon rise and spring forth a better person. I will shine like the rays of sunshine that wake you when you sleep in on a Sunday morning. I will glow not only in the appreciation of the journey I travel, but in the faith that keeps me strong when the path is riddle with hardship… Face everyday with the appreciation you give a spring day……your reward will be endless..Land of Rose

Spring Warmth